A Conveyor Belt of Broken Hopes

"The most terrible thing about the shidduch system is the total one-sidedness and the suddenness of the rejections. You go out with a girl, you talk wonderfully for four hours, you laugh, you find common topics, your views on raising children and on home life align. You leave the meeting walking on air, certain that the feeling is mutual.

And the next morning the shadchan calls you and says drily: 'Menachem, the other side has decided not to continue. Good luck with your search.' And that's it. No explanations, no details. The rules of the game forbid asking why. You're left alone with your thoughts, frantically replaying every minute of the date in your head: 'What did I say wrong? Maybe my joke fell flat? Or she didn't like my suit? Or her parents dug up some rumor?' This conveyor belt of abrupt, faceless rejections leaves deep scars on the soul. It burns away your self-esteem completely, turning you into a hunted person who, before every new date, braces in advance for a stab in the back."